You might need to hear this today. This post was completely inspired and I felt I had to share it right now! Suspend your disbelief and read till the end because this will help. Share with anyone who might also benefit 💛
It's normal to have fears, doubts or worries. You may have fears about taking a leap towards something you want like a new career, starting a business, following your passion or starting a new relationship. It's common to feel limited in some way by your past, your abilities or your circumstances. What if I could help you see how unlimited you are? What if there was one perspective shift that could essentially set you free from all the limitations you feel?
Well, what if I told you that your past circumstances, your beliefs and who you were up until the moment you started reading this post a few seconds ago is not limiting who you can be? It's not limiting who you can be in a year or even in one second from now. Your past and who you currently are is not in the way of who you want to be.
You may raise an eyebrow and say 'but Ayleigh... childhood trauma, attachment styles, star signs, bad breakup, trust issues, financial limitations. My circumstances are in the way.'
I hear you! I understand that having less money than you'd like, feeling unfulfilled or being single may seem like it's in the way of being rich, living with passion and purpose or being happily married... but it's not.
Link by Link: Breaking Free from Limiting Things
We often see one state of being or experience as being connected to the other. It's like our past is in the way of our future as if it were a physical brick wall in front of us. The truth is that this blockage is only a perception. A perception that needs to be fed by us to survive.
Our minds automatically draw connections between experiences. We create linear links and timelines to help us make sense of the world. Our mind automatically assumes that because of an experience we had in childhood, we can't have what we want now. It looks at A and automatically assumes B. Maybe it seems like because of a past bad breakup or trauma, you may not have the happy, love filled relationship you desire. Maybe because you aren't making the money you want now or your parents had a difficult relationship with money, you may feel like you'll never reach the financial abundance you want.
We attach meanings to our experiences and situations that either support us or hold us back. We then carry these experiences (expectations/assumptions) around like massively protective parents, ready to defend their importance against anyone's accusations, and automatically using them as a reason for why we are or are not living the high life (aka 'following our dreams').
Can you imagine saying 'Sorry, I can't ride off into the sunset with you. I don't care if you're prince/princess charming. I don't care if you're nothing like my past bad dating experiences. I have to stay home and look after my cat'?
Or maybe saying 'Sorry I can't come in to accept my tax free check for £1.5 million. I had a cold a few months ago and it might come back'? Hopefully no, because what you want is right in front of you. Generally goals can feel further away and like more has to be done to reach them. They feel more unknown and like more effort, and that makes it easier to stay where we are and as we are.
"Sorry, I can't ride off into the sunset with you. I have to stay home and look after my cat." Imagine...
Our old experiences are used as a base for our reactions. How does this make sense when the people are different, our circumstances are different, and we as people are not even the same as when we had the original experience in the first place?! I kid you not, our body isn't even the same! Our bodies take a staggered approach to cell regeneration and renew but it's possible that around 330 billion cells are replaced daily... so in roughly 80 to 100 days, you are a mostly new person! Imagine how much of you has changed over the years! In essence, one of the only parts of you that may be the same... is the thought patterns you are repeating. So I ask you now, if our bodies are regenerating by letting go of the old and creating the new... why are we holding on to the same old beliefs, opinions and perceptions? That version of us physically does not exist anymore, they only exist in our assumptions and our memories (which can be altered). The old you is pretty much dead and gone (R.I.P), and just like we clean and tidy our homes, we should be spring cleaning our mind too. As Marie Kondo says, does it spark joy? If no, why are you keeping it? Only keep what benefits you.
Around 330 billion cells are replaced daily... so in roughly 80 to 100 days (let alone years), you are a mostly new person! If our body is changing, why are our thoughts the same?
Why Do I Hold on to My Past?
Holding onto limitations is just a defense mechanism your wonderful mind puts in place to protect you from circumstance ever happening again (or the potential chance of you not achieving what you want). It's a kind of 'if I don't try, I can't fail' or a 'I won't be disappointed if I don't get my hopes up' safety mechanism that makes our circumstances go from seeming like a little insignificant trickle of water to a rapid aggressive river that we can not cross (not without help anyway). This keeps us stuck, dissatisfied, feeling like there's things wrong with us or like we are limited by who we are, what we have and what we remember from the past.
Remember, we get what we give our focus to. Our focus is like the secret (not so secret) sauce that helps things to grow. Just look at the confirmation bias, law of assumption, NLP filters, placebo effect, the reticular activating system, self-fulfilling prophecies and the effect of self-concept.
So How Do We Become The Unlimited Being We Really Are?
Do you see what's wrong with that heading/last sentence? You already are unlimited. Unlimited potential is what you naturally are. Ever wondered why it feels horrible to be limited or like you're stuck? Like you're stagnant, not growing, not living the life you want or not making progress? When we feel bad, it's our bodies way of saying something is wrong and drawing our attention to it. Our body is literally alerting us to the effect that not only our lives but our assumptions is having on us. Living a life where you feel disappointed, dissatisfied, and unfulfilled can physically make you sick. Your thoughts and your mind effect your whole body.
Taking Your Power Back
Now, I know you're not holding on to old experiences and beliefs on purpose. I know you don't want to feel the way you do or to have had the experiences you've had. I know it will feel hard and you may want to cry. That's okay. Instead of holding onto circumstances, attachment styles, trauma, star sign limitations, beliefs created from past situations that aren't even present anymore... choose to be aware and make a conscious decision to choose things and thoughts that support what you want.
I'm not saying any of this as someone who has always had a secure attachment style in every relationship type with no trauma, no yucky circumstances, no failed relationships, or no health issues. I'm not saying this as someone whose grass has always been beautifully green, who has already achieved absolutely every goal she will ever have in her life, and is living in LaLaland. I'm saying this as someone who has been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, wore the t-shirt to death, and now will be damned if she lets her past and her old self get in the way of living the life she truly desires. I ask you now to join me in this determination.
Acknowledge your past. Acknowledge your current situations. Acknowledge who you are in this moment and consciously choose to respond differently. Choose to: Let. The. Limitations. Go. I'm not talking tomorrow or next week, I mean right now in this second.
If you keep changing things physically and not seeing the results you want, then something internally has to change.
Remember that having an idea or desire means you have the potential to achieve. Without piling every single limitation in front of it, there are endless possibilities of how you can get to that end result. Literally I can't even put a number on the amount of different ways.
You are unlimited. Limitation is a lie that your mind is using to keep you in what it a safe yet uncomfortable bubble. Desire does not signify lack. It's signifies opportunity.
You can do anything you set your mind to. You can change your perspective about what you can and can't do in an instant. I know it may feel uncomfortable, unnatural or hard at first but it just needs some time. It needs to be nurtured with your focus. Shifting your focus and living from an unlimited mindset is like making a new habit and it will become more natural the more you do it. With determination and push in the right direction, you can build a whole life that you absolutely love. I have faith in you, so please have faith in the unlimited you too!
If you want any support in making this shift and want to see how I can help you to do this, then as usual you can email me at fundamentallyu@gmail.com or you can book a free discovery call here. Until next time, keep being amazing. You are unlimited. x